When it comes to toy preference, you see some of the biggest differences in the ways parents respond when their kid picks up the "wrong" toy -- especially when a boy picks up a girl toy. Children internalize that. They know darn well what mom and dad think about the toy they're playing with. There is an initial biological bias toward these different toys, but then it's very strongly reinforced socially. Studies show peers have a shaping influence. Certainly by age 3, children will pick the socially appropriate toy.
Instead of this ideal of raising a gender-neutral child, shouldn't parents be focused on raising children who have equally positive attitudes toward "maleness" and "femaleness"?
